welcome to big little feelings
a virtual living room for those of us with dysregulated nervous systems.
who am i?
ahh the classic philosophical question. i am you, you are me, we are stardust and so it is! jk. i’m miranda - named after miranda from shakespeare’s the tempest. my parents were thespian’s, so the drama running through my leo veins is not my fault, it’s genetics. i also blame the fact i’m highly sensitive, self-critical, self- deprecating, have anxiety, gut issues, a moustache (say it like the french do) and can sunburn in five minutes or less on my genes. what a glorious creature my parents made!
creative, smart, dramatic and slightly mental people need outlets and writing has always been one of mine. after high school my plan was to go to college, become a tv writer and follow in my father’s warner brother’s footsteps, but as in any good story, nothing went according to plan. i didn’t get into the colleges i wanted to go to, so i went to eating disorder treatment instead. after treatment i interned, worked on film sets, personal assisted for some actors, felt unfilled and decided to become a birth doula. then covid hit. and although 2020 made my anxiety around germs and illness 1000% worse, it was also the year i got married to my wife raven, made a shit ton of bread and started writing again.
since then, the creativity has been creating. i convinced my wife to start a youtube channel, a podcast and a skincare routine with me and then we started a production company (more on that later). speaking of marriage, it’s wild. i’ve been in a lot of therapy, consider myself self- aware, emotionally intelligent, yet there’s nothing like getting hitched to make you realize how unhealed your inner child is. you say “i do” and then it’s, welcome to every big little feeling you’ve ever had all at once. the mirror’s up baby - get ready.
as daunting as it may sound, i think it’s a gift to be able to grow and face your own shit alongside a person who gives you the space to do so. i’ve realized my inability to attend concerts, hang in large crowds or drive in cars with white interior doesn’t mean i’m picky, which is what people have always told me about myself, but actually i’m truly sensitive to lights, sounds and smells. and it’s not my fault, its genetic. also, i have a lot of feelings, which i never learned to regulate or deal with as a kid. one is the need to feel seen, another is to feel heard, another to feel connected, to feel validated, affirmed, special - and i also need quality time, acts of service, physical touch and finally my wife was like, “i didn’t sign up for all the love languages, babes - you’ve got to channel some of these needs and feels into something, because i don’t do feelings” (that’s so raven). and guys, starting a substack was my answer.
what is big little feelings?
BLF is my tiny corner of the internet where feelings, thoughts, and insights collide. every wednesday i will share a post, which could be anything from a personal reflection, a wellness recommendation, or a recipe to whatever is going on in my head that week.
hopefully in this process my words will resonate with you and you’ll feel inclined to subscribe and share with a neighbor or a friend or your uber driver. it would be cool if this became a virtual living room we could escape to when we feel like hanging, but also can’t find the motivation to put pants on - know what i mean? as an introverted extrovert who feels relief when someone cancels plans on her, yet also feels lonely like 97% of the time, this is the perfect vehicle for finding “my people.”
in time, a community which embraces the depth of our emotions - with zero awkward silences - will grow. so grab your favorite coping mechanism and let’s get into it!
you may know me from
because you’re my mom, hi mom!
I’m so proud of my amazing wife. Love this!
I was born a fresh piece of pure cotton paper, the feelings of others like water color. You, my dear, are my people. Subscribed ✔️